Journey Through Genesis
And He Brought Her to the Man ©
By Dr. Akiva Gamliel Belk
B'nai Noach Torah Institute, LLC
Our Devri Torah Limood is in the loving Memory of Lee Daniel, Leann Daniel and Kathleen Travis, Mr. Joseph Edgar Copesteaks, Mrs Gertrude Virginia Copesteaks, Ms Alice Virginia Copesteaks and Mr. Don Bueling may they rest in peace.
Bereisheit [Genesis] 2.18
וַיֹּאמֶר יְהוָֹה אֱלֹהִים לֹא־טוֹב הֱיוֹת הָאָדָם לְבַדּוֹ אֶעֱשֶׂה־לּוֹ עֵזֶר כְּנֶגְדּוֹ:
And Hashem G-d Said it is good for Ha Adam [Adam and Chavah / Eve] to be alone. I will fashion a help mate like[him] opposite [him].
One must question the use of him when we know it is them. Adam and Chavah are in one shared body that is referred to as him.
We see that our Creator Endorses some separation of husband and wife. He Separated them. He Created them.
Originally Adam and Chavah were one body and one soul. Then they were divided. They were separated. Up until this point we know they were in agreement or they could not function. However after they were separated they each had their own individual choices. The Word כְּנֶגְדּוֹ Cih Neg Doh means like him [but] opposite of him. This means Chavah was opposite of him sexually. This also means that Adam was like Adam and that Chavah was like Adam. She was created like him. HOWEVER if Adam would stray from the original Adam, i.e. the created Adam then Chavah would no longer be like the strayed Adam she would be opposite him.
This can work either way. When a man and woman meet they note certain special qualities in each other that attract them to each other. If either alter their attraction the consequences can be serious. One can argue that a certain degree of change is normal. This is true but the core of the individual must remain the same with some exceptions. Those exceptions are injury and illness. When ones mate is either injured or become ill this should NOT ALTER THE RELATIONSHIP. However if the core of the individual in the relationship changes do to other reasons the relationship may fail. One needs to guard against lethargy and stupor.
My first relationship changed. I was a Christian who was Jewish. I was a Christian Pastor who was Jewish. I became a Messianic Christian who was Jewish. I became a Messianic Congregation Leader who was Jewish. I eventually returned to Judaism. My Christian wife was justified in not converting. I was NOT the husband she married. My core principles changed from being those of a Christian / Messianic to those of an Observant Jew. This was a dramatic core change.
My second relationship changed. I was injured while at work. Several years later my wife was diagnosed cancer. Our relationship changed. I was no longer the man she married. She was no longer the woman I married. This was very difficult. Each of the core beings changed because of injury and sickness. My core being changed. I became more dormant. My wife's core being changed Spiritually and sexually.
When an individual's core being changes his / her mate will object. The relationship may not survive.
Bereisheit [Genesis] 2.21
וַיַּפֵּל יְהֹוָה אֱלֹהִים ׀ תַּרְדֵּמָה עַל־הָאָדָם וַיִּישָׁן וַיִּקַּח אַחַת מִצַּלְעֹתָיו וַיִּסְגֹּר בָּשָׂר תַּחְתֶּנָּה:
Hashem G-d Caused a deep sleep to fall on Ha Adam, the man. [This appears like both Adam and Chavah were asleep. Both were not conscious.] Hashem G-d Took from the being that was Ha Adam, [i.e. Adam and Chavah] and closed the flesh in its place.
When a relationship becomes dormant, unexciting, lacking vigor we could say it is in a state of unconsciousness. The true relationship has ended. The relationship is going no where. The woman is taken from the man. The man is separated from the woman. This should be a sign to us that we should guard against allowing our relationships to become dormant. We should do our best to keep our relationship from becoming lethargic or stupor. Relationships need vitality. Relationships need excitement. There is a painful principle here. Both Adam and Chavah were together but they were really alone. Things had to change. They did.
There are several ways of looking at this. G-d Separated the man and woman. G-d Took from the man. The point is the relationship was not working. There had to be a change in the relationship. Adam and Chavah thought alike. They went to the same places. They did everything together. There was no independence from each other. They were always together. We learn from this that relationships need individual space. My brother Gabor Yitzchok tells this story to couples who intend to wed. He says to them, My wife and I take two days off. I take Yom Sheini off and she takes Yom Sh'lishi off.
When our Creator Takes a woman from a man there is a wound left afterwards. Ha Torah Says that [He] closed over the flesh in its place. Anytime a couple separates there is a wound. The man has a wound and the woman has a wound. Make no mistake there is a wound that requires closing. The time required for closing is different for each of us. The Word וַיִּסְגֹּר Vah Yee Sih Gohr means to lock, to close, to shut, to enclose, to bolt shut... When a relationship ends when togetherness ends when sharing ends, when loving ends IT IS PAINFUL!! The flesh must be closed over.
This next part is AMAZING!! Notice the Word in gray. It is תַּחְתֶּנָּה Tah Chih Teh Nawh meaning to close over. However the translation does not explain what is at the core of closing over. The shoresh of תַּחְתֶּנָּה Tah Chih Teh Nawh is חתן Chah Tawn meaning to wed. The point is that marriage heals the wound of what one has lost. So while one requires sometime to adjust after being separated from one's mate the real closing of separation comes with MARRIAGE not a relationship.
וַיִּבֶן יְהֹוָה אֱלֹהִים ׀ אֶת־הַצֵּלָע אֲשֶׁר־לָקַח מִן־הָאָדָם לְאִשָּׁה וַיְבִאֶהָ אֶל־הָאָדָם:
And He, Hashem G-d, Built everything from the Letter Aleph to the Letter Tav from the side that He took from Ha Adam into [the most beautiful] wife and brought her to Adam [the man no longer the couple].
The reason I added the Words 'the most beautiful' to wife is because our Creator who fashioned Chavah built Chavah from everything from the Letter Aleph to the Letter Tav from the side that He took from Ha Adam. The result had to be the best of the best.
וַיֹּאמֶר הָאָדָם זֹאת הַפַּעַם עֶצֶם מֵעֲצָמַי וּבָשָׂר מִבְּשָׂרִי לְזֹאת יִקָּרֵא אִשָּׁה כִּי מֵאִישׁ לֻקֳחָה־זֹּאת:
עַל־כֵּן יַעֲזָב־אִישׁ אֶת־אָבִיו וְאֶת־אִמּוֹ וְדָבַק בְּאִשְׁתּוֹ וְהָיוּ לְבָשָׂר אֶחָד:
וַיִּהְיוּ שְׁנֵיהֶם עֲרוּמִּים הָאָדָם וְאִשְׁתּוֹ וְלֹא יִתְבּשָׁשׁוּ:
May warmth enter our lives. May we find our Soulmate. May our source of goodness be realized by our mate. May it be pleasing. May HaShem Bless us.
Blessings, Love and peace,
Dr. Akiva Gamliel Belk